It made me realize that I have same problem, it has been a long time since I read a book. Even when listening to audiobooks, I am doing something else and rarely truly enjoy them.
Also I start so many projects and then abandon them once I have to fill in details and do grunt work. It is a lot of excitement to setup a new project but to finish something is tedious and boring.
I haven’t read the books mentioned in the above blog post yet. I might but I really liked the idea of digital minimalism. Once I was a minimalist. Other than some furniture, everything else I owned would had fit in a backpack & a small suitcase for clothes.
So going forward, I am going to minimize my digital and social media usage. I already barely carry phone on me when inside the home. And when I do it is mostly because I want to be ready to take photos and videos of my kids. I will try to use GoPro as my default camera.
Also other main use of phone for me is audiobooks. But usually I am playing with my kids while listening to audiobooks and barely understand anything. Might as well 100% focus on kids and read books when I am truly free.
“It’s What I Do” by Lynsey Addario is probably in my top 10 favorite books. As someone who always wanted to be a serious photographer who would use images to make the world better place, I felt a real connection while reading this book. While reading it, I imagined myself being in the situations that Lynsey was in and I really don’t know if I would have been able to handle those situations.
So we bought Minecraft on PS4 and started to play. I preferred to play in 1st person perspective but Ayden preferred 3rd person. But he didn’t know how to ask me change the perspective. So he would say, “Be the people that Evan’s be.”
Tonight, I was reading Puss in the Boots bedtime story to Ayden. Story begins with Old Miller dying.
Ayden asked me if people die in real life. I am not ready for this conversation but I also didn’t want to lie. I said yes and hoped we can move on quickly.
Ayden’s eyes turned teary. In crying voice, he asked, “Why?”
“It just the way it is.” I said.
I watched him as he processed this new information about life. He has seen dead worms, read stories with death in it, but never connected that with people.
Eyes still watery, voice slightly shaky, he asked again, “why do people die?”
I really didn’t know how to respond. I winged it, badly.
He asked, “Do they fix you back to normal?”
One last try to be stoic and I explained that death is normal part of life. There was nothing to be fixed.
“What if you want to play?” he asked with a lot of concern in his voice.
Religion to rescue. I tell him about heaven and how there are all the toys there. He is feeling better, he even smiles when I tell him about all the monster trucks in the heaven. We spent a lot of time discussing heaven and how much fun it is. How we live and play there forever.
Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can't tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start
They tell me I'm too young to understand
They say I'm caught up in a dream
Well life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes
Well that's fine by me
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself, and I
Didn't know I was lost
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself, and I
Didn't know I was lost
I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
Hope I get the chance to travel the world
But I don't have any plans
Wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life's a game made for everyone
And love is a prize
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself, and I
Didn't know I was lost
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself, and I
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Egbert Nathaniel Dawkins / Michael Aaron Einziger / Tim Bergling
Jab aasman girnay lagtay hain
Aur zameen jalnay lagtee hai
Aik chhupa huwa khwaab janam leta hai
Sehraon main awaaz aati hai
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Gham geen hoon
Aur tum mazloom ho
Jab bhook nachtee gaatee hai
Aur nafratein jashan manatein hain
Aik chhupa huwa khwaab janam leta hai
Sehraon main awaaz aati hai
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Majboor hoon
Aur tum bay naam ho
Aik chhupa huwa khwaab janam leta hai
Sehraon main awaaz aati hai
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Gham geen hoon
Aur tum mazloom ho
Tum kaun ho
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Gham geen hoon
Aur tum bay naam ho
Tum kaun ho
Mein kaun hoon
Tum kaun ho
Majboor hoon
Aur tum bay naam ho
There was a time
I used to look into my father's eyes
In a happy home
I was a king, I had a golden throne
Those days are gone
Now they're memories on the wall
I hear the songs from the places where I was born
Up on a hill across the blue lake
That's where I had my first heartbreak
I still remember how it all changed
My father said
Don't you worry, don't you worry, child
See heaven's got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah
There was a time
I met a girl of a different kind
We ruled the world
I thought I'd never lose her out of sight
We were so young
I think of her now and then
I still hear the songs reminding me of a friend
Up on a hill across the blue lake
That's where I had my first heartbreak
I still remember how it all changed
My father said
Don't you worry, don't you worry, child
See heaven's got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
See heaven's got a plan for you
See heaven's got a plan for you
See heaven's got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry, child
See heaven's got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Yeah
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Steve Angello / Sebastian Ingrosso / Axel Hedfors / Martin Lindstrom / Michel Zitron / John Martin
Back when I was a child
Before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high
And dance with my mother and me and then
Spin me around till I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry me
And I knew for sure I was loved
If I could get another chance
Another walk, another dance with him
I'd play a song that would never ever end
How I'd love, love, love to dance with my father again, ooh
When I and my mother would disagree
To get my way I would run from her to him
He'd make me laugh just to comfort me, yeah, yeah
Then finally make me do just what my momma said
Later that night when I was asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
Never dreamed that he would be gone from me
If I could steal one final glance, one final step
One final dance with him
I'd play a song that would never ever end
'Cause I'd love, love, love to dance with my father again
Sometimes I'd listen outside her door
And I'd hear how my mother cried for him
I pray for her even more than me
I pray for her even more than me
I know I'm praying for much too much
But could you send back the only man she loved?
I know you don't do it usually
But dear Lord she's dying to dance with my father again
Every night I fall asleep and this is all I ever dream
Last year, we took Ayden to monster truck show. We didn’t know how loud these trucks can be. So we bought ear protection headphones for him. He was still feeling a little scared.
Later he came up with idea that sound of engine comes from the tires. He would keep telling me that monster trucks tires are loud or they made it louder after he put on his headphone.