Parenting is hard

Only when you have wrong expectations.

It is so easy to know what is right action but sometimes so hard to do it.

Ayden is having rough morning. Well he was having good morning until we took him to his soccer match. He got shy and didn’t want to play. I spend 45 minutes encouraging him. Getting frustrated. Getting embarrassed. Getting angry.

I wanted to leave.

I don’t know what is right behavior. What should have I done. Is it too much to expect your child to do what they wanted to do. If you don’t push your child will they never get out of their comfort zone and never grow. If you push too much will that cause them unnecessary anxiety when they will naturally grow up at their own pace.

Credit cards vs Pokemon cards

Ayden: I don’t want to lose my Pokémon cards

Amer: ok

Ayden: Pokemon cards are very important

Amer: how so?

Ayden: they have all the information about Pokemon. They are not like credit cards. They are better than credit cards.

Ayden says

Ayden: After we die if plants are eating our body how will we go to heaven

Amer: Our soul goes

Ayden: And we get a new body

Amer: Sure

Ayden: Can we get different skin

Amer: Sure what color you want

Ayden: Pink

It is so hard to choose

Ayden deciding his career:

“There are so many cool job, I want to be fireman, goalie, dad, police officer, monster truck driver.”

Zayn's Words

Dada - Dolphin

DoDo - Shark

Kaka - Orca

Meow - Cat

Moo - Cow

Kaykey - sticker

American flag is better than Texas flag

Ayden: Baba, American flag is better than Texas flag.

Me: How come?

Ayden: Because it has more stars!

My heart is growing bigger

Driving to Ayden’s first Monster Jam show earlier this, as AT&T stadium got in our view, he is getting excited. His heart was probably beating faster and he could probably feel it. He said the cutest thing ever, “Baba, my heart is growing bigger.”

Nightmares of 4 years old

1. We are in our house on second floor. There is a giant lobster outside.
2. There is Amazon delivery truck. There is a package. There is a car. The delivery truck is crushing the car and possibly package.

Be the people that Evan's be

Last year, Ayden got into Minecraft thanks to Evan Storm’s channel.

So we bought Minecraft on PS4 and started to play. I preferred to play in 1st person perspective but Ayden preferred 3rd person. But he didn’t know how to ask me change the perspective. So he would say, “Be the people that Evan’s be.”

Can you bring toys back home?

Tonight, I was reading Puss in the Boots bedtime story to Ayden. Story begins with Old Miller dying.

Ayden asked me if people die in real life. I am not ready for this conversation but I also didn’t want to lie. I said yes and hoped we can move on quickly.

Ayden’s eyes turned teary. In crying voice, he asked, “Why?”

“It just the way it is.” I said.

Wheels and Engine Sound

Last year, we took Ayden to monster truck show. We didn’t know how loud these trucks can be. So we bought ear protection headphones for him. He was still feeling a little scared.

Later he came up with idea that sound of engine comes from the tires. He would keep telling me that monster trucks tires are loud or they made it louder after he put on his headphone.

think hard

Other day while putting Ayden to sleep, he looked like as if he was intensely thinking. I asked him, “Are you thinking something?”

“Yes” he replied.

“What are you thinking?” I asked

“I don’t know what car to play with in the morning, baba!”

New Career Direction

Today Ayden said, “Jack (his friend) wants to be firetruck driver and I will be ambulance driver. Jack will put out fires. I will take people to hospital. It will be so much fun.”

What do you want to be when you grow up

Yesterday, after I picked up Ayden from his daycare, he said, he didn’t know what he wants to be. I guess they asked him this question in his class. I told him he has plenty of time to figure it out. There is no rush.

Then later at night he said, “Baba, I know what I want to be. I want to be a Tow Truck Driver.” He said it would be so much fun to tow cars.

Ask HN: Parents of HN, what are your best sources for evidence-based parenting?

Here is a list of parenting books recommended by members of Hacker’s News community. All links are affiliate links to purchase these books from Amazon:

How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen, and How to Listen So Your Kids Will Talk

One of a few books that are recommended multiple times in this thread. 4.5 stars with 1000+ reviews.

Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool by Emily Oster swp-block-image}

Another book that was recommended by multiple people.

Baby vs Dog

It is amazing how having your own kids changes everything.

I love my my dog and because of him I love almost all dogs. I hated leaving him home, so much, that I would not go to restaurants that don’t let dogs in patio. (With Whiskey Cake being notable exception). Every grocery trip, I would buy him a new toy, many times had arguments with wife because he had too many toys. Every vacation we would have huge argument because I wanted dog friendly vacation where we can take our dog.